The Wonderful World of Newts, excluding Gingrich

Greetings, your dedication to the preservation of our good friends the newts has brought you here. I, for one, feel that the plight of newts has not been given the media coverage it deserves. We routinely hear about cuddly panda bears, or majestic elephants, but when was the last time you heard of a newt???

*pauses for dramatic effect*

Newts are our friends!!!

Even Budweiser has neglected to have any newts advertising their products. They use frogs and iguanas, so why not newts?? I will soon provide you with a method of getting in touch with Budweiser to express your desire for some newt spokesanimals. Thank you in advance for your dedication to the cause.

FAQ's

Q: What the @#$&* are newts?
A: Quite simply they are members of the family Salimandridae.
Triturus helveticus is known...
Wait, that might be wasted on you...They're salamanders.

Q: My snotty little three year old sister wants a newt for her birthday. Should I get her one?
A: Do you like her or not? If you don't, I would advise you to get Salamandra salamandra,
affectionately known as the European fire salamander. It oozes poison when it gets upset :)
Plus, it bears live young, so you'll have plenty to use on your parents and enemies as well :)

The beautiful firesalamander

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~Action Figure Nita
August 17th, 1998